Psalm 77:12 I will meditate on all your works and consider all your mighty deeds. (NIV)

The Psalmist writes this after he describes his inability to sleep because his brain just won’t stop thinking.  He lays there and thinks about all of his troubles, he’s remembering, he’s writing songs, he’s wondering how the Lord is going to solve his problems… in essence, he has insomnia.  Then a thought clicks and he decides to think about all of the good things of God, all of his works and miracles.  He made a choice to rest his thoughts on the goodness of the Lord.  I bet that’s what he was doing when sleep overtook him at last.

How many times have I laid in bed doing the same exact thing?  Rehashing my history, planning my future, rehearsing details for the next day, thinking about something I would like to create, wondering how God is going to piece together the puzzle of my life….  Could going to sleep really rely on a simple decision to refocus my thoughts?  To let my mind rest on the beauty of God?  Hmmm… can’t wait to try it, which will most likely be tonight.

Lord, your provision for all of the parts of me is overwhelming.  To even include an antidote for insomnia in your word is beautiful.  Let my mind find rest in thinking about your goodness. 

Nehemiah 9:19 “But in your great mercy you did not abandon them to die in the wilderness. The pillar of cloud still led them forward by day, and the pillar of fire showed them the way through the night.”

The children of Israel were so fickle, all or nothing, hot or cold, off or on.  They took incredible steps of faith and walked in blessing and favor, being miraculously led through an unknown place.  When they got overwhelmed by their situation, they just did an 180o, literally began worshipping an idol.  But God still showed them mercy, allowed them to regroup, and still guided them.  And His miracles were exactly what were needed at that moment.  His provision was specific to the need and situation and left no question as to who was providing.

I am like a child of Israel.  My love for God runs deep, but so quickly I forget what He’s brought me through.  I lack faith and obedience.  I get overwhelmed regularly.  But, God is so merciful and patient with me, He is still guiding me.  He is still providing for me.  My future is not totally clear.  Yes, I can see the path directly in front of me.  The excitement for life that my children show me daily, is my miracle pillar of cloud in the day.  My prophetic dreams and absence of loneliness in the evening, is my pillar of fire at night.  These things give me courage to keep moving forward.  I’m on the right track.

Lord, I am so thankful for your mercy and patience.  Help me to absorb it so much that it seeps onto others.  Thank you for your guidance and provision.

Jeremiah 29:8 Also, seek the peace and prosperity of the city to which I have carried you into exile. Pray to the Lord for it, because if it prospers, you too will prosper.” …11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

 God is speaking this to the Israelites who are in exile.  They are literally waiting to be brought back to their homeland, but instead God gives them this promise.  He actually encourages them to plant themselves where they are, to build relationships, to pray for prosperity in the land where they are, in essence… to LIVE and LOVE. 

This promise has spoken to me and my children more through this season of exile than any others.  My kids can all quote this scripture, and we repeat it to each other when we have those moments of fear and uncertainty.  When our future is not clear and seems bleak, and our hearts are breaking again over what could have been… we remind ourselves that God has a plan for us, that his plan for us includes blessing and hope.  That He has a FUTURE for us!  I am encouraged to not just wait for that future, but to really live and to love where I am now.  God’s promises come true each day.  Each day is yesterday’s future.  I am challenged to pray for peace and prosperity every day, no matter where I am in life.  I am reminded to plant myself, establish relationships, be connected with the people in my life, wherever I am today. 

God thank you for this promise.  Thank you for reminding me again that you know what is going on.  Thank you that I am not in charge.  Help me to continue to learn to trust You in everything, and in the promise of Your plans and future for us.  Help me to truly live each day to its fullest, and not wait until the “right moment” to take it all in.  Thank you that each day is a day of promise.

Ruth 2:14 At the lunch break, Boaz said to her, "Come over here; eat some bread. Dip it in the wine." So she joined the harvesters. Boaz passed the roasted grain to her. She ate her fill and even had some left over.

So this part of the story happened after Ruth had already pledged her loyalty to her mother-in-law Naomi, and had stepped into a role of taking care of her.  In that role, Ruth took the initiative to get some food for her and Naomi, so she went out to glean a field.  She did not intentionally go to Boaz’s field, who happened to be a relative.  Ruth was a foreigner, a widow, with no friends, no man to take care of her but with an elderly woman depending on her, no connections at all…. and was going to work at somewhat of a personal risk to herself, as it was a common fear for women to be raped or abused as they were out in a far off field.  I think she was really brave, or maybe just really hungry.  Either way, God supernaturally guided her to the right field.   So Boaz happens to see her out there, and asks about her.  I’m thinking that he “noticed” her, that he thought she was beautiful.   Was it really common for the owner of the field to notice and inquire about a gleaner?  She wasn’t even an employee, a hired worker… she was a charity case.  He then instructed his workers to give her special treatment and make sure that she got some of the “good stuff”.  So in this verse, he actually calls her over to enjoy lunch with him and his employees.  Do you think Boaz always ate lunch with his harvesters?  Or was he interested in eating lunch with her?  Hmmm…  He passed her the grain.  Maybe their fingers touched during the exchange.  I can imagine him sitting next to her, not able to take his eyes off of her, making sure that she gets enough to eat.  I wonder if the other workers were noticing his attention to her.  I wonder what they were thinking?  The bible doesn’t mention anything about his workers arguing with him or having a bad attitude about giving her special treatment.  In fact, they went right along with it happily it seems.  This speaks to the love and respect they had for Boaz I think.  Maybe they liked seeing him fall for this beautiful woman.  I’m also struck with the fact that Ruth accepted the invitation, and felt comfortable enough to join in the lunch.  Maybe in her home country, Ruth was not a “charity case”, showing us how she also humbled herself to the lowly position of gleaner, all because she had a mission to accomplish.  Ruth not only ate enough lunch for her, but she also had left-overs and was able to take them home to Naomi.  What an awesome day for Ruth!  She acted in loyalty and kindness, embraced her responsibility, put on a brave face, humbled herself, AND held her chin up in confidence.  She was rewarded with a “coincidental” connection, an abundance of food, respect, and the first glimmers of her love story.

There is so much for me to “glean” from this passage.  Ha-ha.  I too have found myself with no man, but with a ton of responsibilities.  I am not a foreigner, although I do find this position in life quite foreign.  I have embraced my responsibilities, have been loyal and kind, have put on a brave face, have humbled myself, and have remained confident.  I know that God had guided me, connected me with people, has provided more than enough for me, has built up my reputation, and has given me a glimpse of a love story.  I am encouraged.

Lord, thank you for including in your word, these cool stories of your people.  I have always loved the story of Ruth, and just love how she speaks to me.  Thank you for teaching me about loyalty, responsibility, humility, confidence… and that these attributes of a “strong” person can be rewarded with things like ABUNDANT provision, great company, and love.  Thank you for thinking I'm beautiful, thank you for believing in me, and thank you for working out the details of my finances and future.  You are truly awesome.

Mark 16:3 They worried out loud to each other, “Who will roll back the stone from the tomb for us?”4 Then they looked up, saw that it had been rolled back—it was a huge stone—and walked right in.

The women were busy about the Lord’s work, and being women, were worried about the job ahead of them.  They knew that THEY couldn’t roll back the stone, it was too heavy for them.  So they did what they could do, and proceeded trusting that somehow they would be able to complete their task, even though they couldn’t do it alone.  They didn’t arrange for men to help, they just wondered and trusted, and WENT ANYWAY.  They did their end, and God did his.

In my own life, I often wonder how something will work out.  There are so many things that now as a single woman, a single mother… I have NO IDEA how it’s all going to work together for good.  I don’t need to worry about it, or make arrangements.  I just need to keep doing my end, and God will do his.

Jesus, thank you for all that you are teaching me about trust.  I never thought I would be in this place, but here I am , and here you are.  May all of my efforts be about your work.  May my end be my absolute best.  May the things I’m teaching my children stick somewhere in their hearts, and may you fill up the gaps, cracks and holes.  May my efforts be supernaturally multiplied.  May my two hands seem like many.